Okay. It’s the first of a new month. Three weeks ago on a Monday I said “Okay heart, fuck you, this week is going to belong to me.” Let’s see if I can make another run at that, since I failed pretty miserably at not falling in love with anyone in October. Interestingly, I have some past and present fronts presenting that I should totally keep my feelings to myself because they really don’t do those people any good, and other people present in my life still maintaining that I should be totally open with them and that they value the opportunity to keep that space for me. Which is totally admirable, considering, but I’m having a really hard time sifting through my emotions deciding if, in the long run, I’ll have a relationship with the desire and emotional fortitude to reciprocate my openness, or if I should learn to live with that not being a possibility.

Or maybe I’ll just cook some wealth, and forget all the girls that made me happy for a while.